March 22, 2014

Update Part 2

I really can't even begin to tell you how excited I was to finally be at the hospital. I filled out all of my paperwork, paid my copay and headed upstairs to find my room. There was lots to do from the second I stepped through the door. I had to change into my gown, give a urine sample, get an iv and go through a whole list of questions, information and papers to sign. Once all that was done, they started the first medication I had to have and then all we had to do was wait. Let me just say, I am absolutely not a patient person. Of course they tell you to sleep, but they come in every hour to check the medication and see if contractions are starting. The last thing on my mind was sleeping, but that didn't stop my hubby from snoozing away. Finally, they came to check me and decided I was ready to start the pitocin. Pitocin is a game I really don't like to play. They kept having to adjust the dose, up and down, for hours. It made my contractions come one right after another and no break in between. I didn't want an epidural, they make me nervous. In the end, I had to have one. There was no way around it. The contractions were so bad that I had three doses before it finally even touched my pain. The nurses checked me after the epidural kicked in and I was dilated to between 3 and 4. About 20 minutes later they came back to check  me before going to lunch and her head was in the birth canal. I pushed a total of about 4 times and my baby girl was born at 11:58pm. She weighed 6 pounds 10 ounces and was 19.25 inches. After five years, two miscarriages, countless doctor appointments, money, tears, frustrations...I was finally holding my miracle baby. There are no words to describe what that feeling is like. I know most all parents are grateful and happy about having a baby, but I think when you are in a situation like ours, it makes it a million times sweeter. It is seeing every hope and dream you had and thought would never be, come true. 

Now that I have had her, many people have asked what I am going to do about birth control. My answer is very simple. Nothing. This had caused some issues with a few people that think the risk of having another baby so close to the first is too risky or just not the thing to do, but I have my reasons. I am a firm believer that birth control helped play a part in my hormones being so screwed up. I am terrified to even think about going back on it, because I think it will make it harder to get pregnant again. The way I see it, it took me five years to be blessed with this child. If it takes another five years, then I really can't afford to wait. It will happen when and if my body decides it will happen and I'm okay with whenever that may be. We are not aggressively trying yet. I'm not tracking my ovulation and timing intercourse or anything like that. We are simply just not worryig about or thinking about it. If it hasn't happened after what we feel is enough time, then we will begin all over again with the ttc journey. The purpose of this blog was to help me deal with my infertility journey and to give a voice to and help others. Just because I had my miracle baby does't change what I went through or what this is all about. Yes, I will talk about my daughter from time to time. Some of my readers like that part of my story too, but I will try to focus on the journey for number 2. I am proud to say I am an infertility success story. I hope my story brings hope to others, for what are we without hope?