Impatient

It seems as though my supplements are working, so far anyway. I thought I ovulated not long after starting my supplements and I predicted that I should start on this past Friday. My ovulation is painful enough that I don't actually need my monitor to tell me when it happens. The only thing my monitor is for is to tell me the fertile days up to ovulation and for the most part it has always been right on. I started spotting on Friday and then I actually started early Saturday morning, so I think the supplements are actually doing their job. I was pretty skeptical at first, but not so much anymore. I guess we will see how this cycle goes and whether or not it is a "normal" one. In my book a "normal" cycle is one that doesn't go over 35 days, is at least 28 days, has a luteal phase of at least 12 days and at most 14, and of course I have to ovulate. I consider this past cycle regulating itself a small victory and if this next cycle stays on track then I may allow myself to once more think there may be hope in getting pregnant again after all. In five days it will be exactly one year since I lost my second baby and I haven't been able to get pregnant since then.

Hopefully these supplements work, but if they don't I have a whole list of other things to fall back on. I have a list of tests I want to done, medications I would like to try, I want to try IUI again and I would like to see a new reproductive endocrinologist. I have come across a few other conditions that I could possibly have, especially since none of the doctors I went to actually ran any tests to rule out other causes before saying I have PCOS. There is one condition called Non Classical Congenital Adrenal Hyperplasia that I would really like to be checked for. This condition is genetic, so there is no curing it (PCOS isn't curable either). However, treatment is low dose glucocorticosteriods. Treatment can give back full reproductive capabilities and lower miscarriage rates. This condition mimics PCOS almost exactly, but anxiety and depression are also markers for this condition. I was diagnosed with panic/anxiety attacks years ago and battle with depression on and off. A simple blood test can determine if you have NCCAH and newborns can be screened for it so you know first thing if it was passed on. It's not life threatening and you do not need life long treatment. If you have been diagnosed with PCOS or think you have PCOS and the PCOS treatment isn't working, then you may want to get checked for this condition because PCOS treatment won't help it. Some people have both conditions and need treatment for both in order to conceive.

There are so many different directions I could go with my treatment from here and it is extremely hard to pick just one and stick with it long enough to give it time to work. I want to get pregnant NOW and I can feel I am running out of time. There are so many tests to possibly have done, procedures to try and medications that may work and I feel like I am going to run out of time before I find the miracle one that works. I know that any treatment takes at least three months to reach full potential and longer than that for most results, but it's so hard to not want to try something else every cycle. I know I have to give the supplements I'm doing now until the end of December at least to see if they are working, but I already want to try something else. I have lost all patience when it comes to getting pregnant. I hope those of you reading this and ttc have more patience and more luck than I do. Baby Dust...